Episode 170: Trustworthy vs. Riskworthy with Randa Stratton

Welcome everybody to today’s episode. I have Randa Stratton Dutcher with me.

I met her in person, finally, after being in some of the same communities online for some time now, at the Success Code Live and actually at the Joa Collective mid to late January.

Thank you so much for being willing to come on my podcast. It was at that event I decided there are so many amazing authors, so many life-changing stories, I wanted to bring you all on to my podcast. We’ll get to the book that is yours and the story that is yours in a little bit, but let’s start out first—if you can share, just give us your background.

Sure. Yeah. I’m an Arizona girl through and through. I’m 5th generation and I’m very proud of that. I married a 5th generation boy from a small town in Arizona, and we have 5 kids. When I was pregnant with our 5th child, we got divorced, and 2 and a half years later we got remarried. This December 2025 will be our 11th year of this second marriage together.

I’ve been a life coach, I have run retreats, I wrote 2 books in 2023, and I have 3 kids left at home. By the end of this school semester, I’ll have 2 left at home, and I’m filling in a very weird space. But most of all, my deep love is singing. I love to sing. I am a rodeo girl, a horse girl, and I sing national anthems at quite a few rodeos a year and at other sporting events. I’m working on getting more singing experiences into my life right now. And I have a podcast—the Going Dutch Podcast.

Thank you for that background. Maybe I didn’t catch it—what is your faith background?

Yes, I was raised in the LDS faith. My great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather is named in the Doctrine and Covenants. He was an assistant to Joseph Smith. My husband comes from that same kind of line—not the same family line, but probably 6 generations ago. We still go to church, we raise our kids in the LDS faith, and we believe we are giving different perspectives.

If I remember correctly from when we chatted earlier, your book goes into some of this story a little more in depth. Is that right?

No, I haven’t actually written about this yet. My 2 books—one is a children’s book called You Have a Gift: Shine Bright. It’s geared towards children figuring out what their gifts are, because everyone has gifts, and sometimes they aren’t obvious like sports, music, or acting. Maybe they’re organizing, being happy, or making friends wherever you go.

The other is a collaboration book called Healing Through Broken Relationships, where I was the head author. There are 16 other authors, and my chapter specifically speaks about suicide ideation.

We’ll be sure to leave those links in the show notes for folks to access. I heard you say “yet”—you haven’t written about that yet.

Yeah, I haven’t felt called to be public about all of my feelings and emotions. And I know I’m not alone in them. I don’t have hard feelings. Being through a divorce, having my parents divorce when I was little, and other family traumas—I think I’m just in a space where I believe every family, religion, political party, country, city, and town has flavors. There’s not always a good flavor, and there’s not always a bad flavor.

To love my family, I accept the good and the bad that I think is bad. I kind of look at the LDS faith the same way. There are some things I really don’t agree with, some I feel indifferent to, and others I view differently. But my husband and I feel this is a great community for our kids. Our ward is wonderful and accepting.

One day I was sitting in church, questioning why I was there, and I felt God wrap His arms around me and say, “You’re in a space where everyone is trying to do their best every week. There’s not another space for you like this right now, so this is the best place for you to be.” That’s where I’m at.

I love that. Thank you for sharing. It’s not always easy to open up about our faith journeys, because they’re sacred and personal. If you can think of a time you began to realize parts of your belief system weren’t working for you anymore—or were shifting—can you share how you moved through that?

Yes. My parents had me in high school in a very small town, and there was a lot of shame and gossip. I realized a few years ago I had taken on that shame, probably even in utero. Shame became my motivator—if I could feel guilt or shame about something, I could push myself to be better.

Around 2017–2018, I had an experience that felt like I had committed murder—though I hadn’t done anything wrong. I went to God the next day and asked for forgiveness. I immediately felt peace, like, “We’re good, move on.” But I didn’t want to believe it. I continued punishing myself for years, with depression and suicidal thoughts.

By 2020–2021, I did deep soul searching and asked, “If God says this isn’t wrong, what else have I been making myself wrong for that really isn’t a big deal?” I found a lot. Things I’d been taught were “terrible” were actually just experiences to move on from. Now my mantra is, “What fruit is this bringing?”

That’s powerful.

It’s made me a totally different mother. I no longer shame my kids or set impossible expectations. My oldest son often says, “I love this mom—I can finally talk to you.” My younger kids have more freedom to choose. It’s also improved my marriage. I can now listen to my husband’s doubts or differing views without shutting down.

I love that. You sang for us last week—do you have a song you’ve written that embodies this journey?

Yes, 18 months ago I wrote No More—about going through my divorce, saying yes to yourself, and choosing to live. Recently, I wrote another song that starts, “The world is beautiful, and it’s changing now.”

Beautiful. You have a gift. We’ll link your book in the show notes. Final question: what does it mean to you to live beyond the shadow of doubt?

When I chose to get remarried, I told a mentor I didn’t know if I could trust again. He said, “Lots of people aren’t trustworthy, but people are risk-worthy.” If you’re connected to God and know who you are in that relationship, you can trust Him and risk with others. I may never live without questions, but I choose to trust that what’s coming is worth the risk.

Yes—that’s a great answer. I think living with questions keeps us learning.

I wanted to thank you, Meagan, for your courage to step into uncertainty and keep sharing your unique journey.

Thank you.

Now, some quick fun questions—favorite book?

The Game of Life and How to Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn.

Introvert or extrovert?

Introvert, but I can sing to thousands.

Favorite artist?

Whitney Houston—love the power in her voice.

Night owl or morning lark?

Morning lark.

Celebrity crush?

Glenn Powell.

Still or carbonated water?

Carbonated—flavored, like Bubbly, or Topo Chico with lime.

Furthest place traveled?

Jerusalem, Jordan, and Tahiti.

Thank you for joining me today.

Thank you.