In this episode I explore how faith and doubt can co-exist without it being a problem. We cannot have and exercise FAITH if uncertainty and doubt do not exist. When we resist, deny or ignore our questions/doubts, we are being dishonest to ourselves. We give ourselves permission to have them through acknowledging their presence. We can choose to let go of the shame that often accompanies having questions/doubts. When we release the shame, and give ourselves permission to have them, we are then on our way to owning our questions and doubts and cultivating authenticity. The ability to be authentic makes it possible to claim our personal authority which I define as part free will and also part “the light of Christ” which is within each of us. By leaning into this personal authority is how we tap into and connect w/ our inner wisdom or knowing. And ultimately this is what allows us to examine our questions and doubts, own them and even learn to ask better questions or the “right” questions. “Disciples too must persevere until we get the questions right. We are all prisoners of our preconceptions and faulty models. Those are frequently the problem in faith crisis—not the questions that arise from them.” –The Crucible of Doubt: Reflections on the Quest for Faith, Terryl Givens, Fiona Givens.
Show Notes: “A Paradox of Faith and Doubt,” written by Joanna Mercuri, based on the examining the relationship between faith/doubt through a lecture and panel discussion by Fordham’s Center of Religion and Culture entitled: “Uneasy Grace: Can Faith and Doubt Co-exist?” (https://news.fordham.edu/living-the-mission/a-paradox-of-faith-and-doubt/); The Crucible of Doubt: Reflections on the Quest for Faith, Terryl Givens, Fiona Givens;
“The Beyond the Shadow of Doubt” podcast is a proud member of the Dialogue Podcast Network: DialogueJournal.com/podcastnetwork.
Hello everybody — Welcome to episode 9 of “The Beyond the Shadow of Doubt” podcast.
My name is Meagan Skidmore, and I am a Life transitions coach. I work w/ parents of lgtbq+ kiddos of a conservative faith background who feel their world has turned upside down. I also work with lgbtq+ teens.
I started “The Beyond the Shadow of Doubt” podcast in an attempt to bring the traditionally taboo topic of doubt and questioning out of the shadows of shame and into the sunlight. I want to contribute to breaking the stigma that they are a bad thing, while simultaneously creating safer spaces to discuss them & also normalizing that we all have them.
I am proud to share that I am a member of the Dialogue Podcast Network: DialogueJournal.com/podcastnetwork. The Dialogue Podcast Network features shows by Latter-day Saints who wish to bring their faith into dialogue with the larger stream of world religious thought and with human experience as a whole and to foster artistic and scholarly achievement based on their cultural heritage.
I want to first start out by posing a few questions; I hope you will give them sincere thought:
1.) Do you have doubts or questions? Do you give yourself permission to have and acknowledge them? Even if to yourself only?
2.) Do you share them with others?
If not, I invite you to dig deep and ask yourself why you do not.
If you answer yes that you do share them with others, I invite you to determine if you censor what you share?
3.) Finally, what are the settings you feel most comfortable sharing doubts and/or questions?
In Podcast #7 “Doubt is not the same as Unbelief”, I quoted Christian author, Barnabas Piper
“The word “doubt” is an uncomfortable one in most Christian circles. It’s something that is frowned upon or even condemned in many church circles. But that doesn’t stop us from doubting; it just makes doubting shameful for many of us. We don’t know what to do with it, who to talk to about it, or how to talk about it. We just know that our questions feel like they are pulling us away from God.”
If you have been following along and listening to my podcast, you know that I have shifted in the way I view having questions and doubts. You know that the opposite of faith is not doubt, but rather the opposite of faith is certainty.
When we hear that and internalize this relationship of faith and doubt, we then can allow the two to co-exist without it being a problem.
Let me share what I mean. The following passage is from an article called “A Paradox of Faith and Doubt,” written by Joanna Mercuri 10/17/13 which is based on the examining the relationship between faith/doubt through a lecture and panel discussion by Fordham’s Center of Religion and Culture entitled: “Uneasy Grace: Can Faith and Doubt Co-exist?”
>>>>The event featured Terry Eagleton, author of Reason, Faith, and Revolution: Reflections on the God Debate(published by Yale University Press, 2010)
One way to understand how faith works, Eagleton said, is through Bigfoot: The evidence as to whether Bigfoot exists is ambiguous; as a result, some people believe he exists while others don’t.
“Substitute ‘God’ for ‘Bigfoot’ here and you have a version of what faith consists in,” Eagleton said. Some have religious faith, and some don’t.
“And although faith is a matter of “passionate conviction,” this does not put faith at odds with doubt. Doubt, he said, is essential to the very definition of faith.
“Doubt only exists in a context of certainty,” he said. “Doubt isn’t some sinful lapse from unwavering faith—it’s actually built into it. A proposition you couldn’t doubt wouldn’t be a matter of faith.”
“In the same way that faith and reason are not incompatible, doubt is not a threat to faith.”
“You can be certain that you love someone… while succumbing to the occasional doubt,” he said.
Ultimately, when it comes to faith, certainty is less of a problem than the ways in which we act from our faith, Eagleton said. Too much of either faith or doubt can tip someone toward dogmatism and radicalism, which inevitably divide people and societies. It is important to balance certainty and open-mindedness, [Eagleton said]—to allow faith and doubt to coexist.”
Oct 17, 2013
[https://news.fordham.edu/living-the-mission/a-paradox-of-faith-and-doubt/]
We cannot have and exercise FAITH if uncertainty and doubt do not exist. As Eagleton said, it is requisite to the very definition of faith
Going back to the 3 questions I first posed….
we must first acknowledge that we have questions/doubts. If we are resisting, in denial or ignoring them, we are actually being dishonest to ourselves.
Part of giving ourselves permission to have them is through acknowledging their presence.
How? We can choose to let go of the shame or embarrassment that often accompanies it. By doing so this helps us to purposefully create our outcome.
When we release the shame, and give ourselves permission to have them, we are then on our way to OWN our Qs and DOUBTS
owning our questions
requires us to be honest, authentic first w/ ourselves and then w/ others
that will cultivate trust and fosters an atmosphere where true connection can occur — when we feel connected we feel like we belong. We all want to belong, to the point of hiding parts of ourselves for fear we won’t “belong.”
However the more that we can be vulnerable and authentic, and by extension connected, we indirectly invite others to do the same
I truly believe authenticity begets authenticity bec I’ve experienced it.
Of course I’m not suggesting you send your nervous system awry; you want to cultivate authenticity in a way that is mentally/emo healthy for you. Start with baby steps.
Being authentic requires us to claim our personal authority, and owning our truth meaning the truth of what our lived experience is—our highs/lows, our gifts/challenges, our sorrows/joys, our struggles/strengths our lived realities vs those of others.
I define personal authority as part free will or free agency and also part “the light of Christ” which is within each of us. Some people call it conscience
And I believe by leaning into this personal authority is also how we tap into and connect w/ our inner wisdom or inner knowing.
Our personal authority is what allows us to choose how we want to move forward and allow others their God-given right, capacity, gift & ability to do the same.
[Be the one to go first. Step up. Help normalize doubts and create safe spaces by being vulnerable and sharing your doubts/quesionts.]
Claiming Personal authority allows us to examine our questions and doubts, and even learn to ask better questions or the “right” questions.
The Crucible of Doubt: Reflections on the Quest for Faith, Terryl Givens, Fiona Givens
MAYBE SHARE THIS along with exerpts from John J. Ivers book (Ashly’s co-podcaster)
Page 9: Daniel Dennett wrote, “Philosophy …is what you have to do until you figure out what questions you should have been asking in the first place.” Disciples too must persevere until we get the questions right. We are all prisoners of our preconceptions and faulty models. Those are frequently the problem in faith crisis—not the questions that arise from them. After all, the Restoration unfolded because a young man asked questions, The scriptures are replete with encouragement to question—“ask that you may know the mysteries of God” is a common injunction, as is the oft-quoted verse from James 1—“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all….liberally …; and it shall be given” —and we also receive many assurances that questioning will bear fruit: “surely shall you received a knowledge of whatsoever things you shall ask in faith.” The unexamined paradigms with which we begin can negatively affect a healthy propensity to question. They can point us in the wrong direction, misdirect our attention, or constrain the answer we are capable of hearing.” In those circumstances, as JS learned, some people will fly to pieces like glass as soon as anything comes that is contrary to their traditions.”
I suggest that it is our ability to claim our personal authority (part free will or free agency and also part “the light of Christ”) that allows us to ask the right questions and own our Qs through our willingness to be authentic and vulnerable. I’d love to hear your questions.
If have some you’d like to chat about use the “work with me” button on my website. Your first visit is complementary. You can also send me your questions through Soc media or email. All links are on my website https://meaganskidmorecoaching.com.
You can also access my free interactive Resource Guide for LGBTQ+ families— 20+ pages of resources that I have found and/or used along my own journey.
Thank you for joining! Until next time.